Unlike most children, I never looked up to my mother as my role model. Even when I was young, I've always wanted to have an another mother. I never liked my mother's personality. She's too noisy when she nags, a certified nagger, she only cooks one viand for us (law-uy), she always tend to exaggerate things. Most of the time, her presence annoys me a LOT because I wasn't used that she stays home all the time. When I was growing up, she's really busy tending to her then "alive" drug store from the morning till 10 in the evening. I was never close to my mother, in fact, I'm proud to say that I'm a daddy's girl. I rather listen to my dad while he nags or get mad because for me, those words are for my well-being. But when Mom says something or nags, it means a big insult on my part. Her busyness in tending and looking out in her store contributed in building an invisible wall between me and her. Well I think she already noticed it because I'm not the type of child who spills problems to her parents. I was never like that.
I'm close to my mother yet I hate to open up with her. I'm also like this to my dad. Although I may have said negative things about her, I can't fathom the thought of losing my mom. I owe her my life. I always say bad things about her yet when those words sink in my mind, it's like a double-edged sword hit us invisibly. I got hit yet she'd get hit the most.
I don't say this to her often but I really love her. When you reach this age, you would always love to say those three words to some random person you just like rather than the person who almost crossed the border of death just to bring you into this world. Yes it's silly but it happens.
I love you Mama! Kahit grabe ako mag-suplada sayo like all the time, ganyan lang talaga siguro ako magsukli ng gratitude sa lahat ng binigay at sinacrifice mo para sa amin ni Gabriel. We love you so much!
P.S Sana di siya ma-offend kung mabasa niya to, lalo na sa first paragraph, malaman dun eh :D
